I remember you like yesterday, yesterday.

Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast,
it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts,
always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

Happy Valentines Day, my favourite people :)
May all of us experience today the Greatest Love of all :)

***

Even though I'm spending it alone and far away, valentines day still makes me so happy. I know its just a stupid, commercial holiday that was devised by some money-grubbing capitalist opportunist, but just knowing that girls all over the world are receiving nice gifts from boys who seemingly love them, makes me happy enough.

They say Valentines Day is a day for girls. I don't deny that. But it is also a day to celebrate your love. Be it with friends, family, boyfriends or cats. I always thought flowers were stupid and impractical because they are only given to wither and die. That was until I received one. I know its probably the most brainless gift ever, something that doesn't last. But still, as long as the flower is alive, you don't know how a girl's day can be changed so easily. So boys, go against all practical and logical rationalisation and go ahead and get those overpriced flowers for them girls ;)


Its only you I want to spend this day with. And I know you're miles away. But still, I remember you like yesterday, yesterday :)

bel far niente

The art of doing nothing.

That phrase probably sums up the day of recuperation after last night's partying. Woke up late, had lunch, read a book, walked in the snow, went to school for amazing intercultural class and talked about the sub cultures of Singapore (I was stumped. Because to me, there are none. Only a number of dominant cultures.) and an Italian Brazil football friendly with the boys. Bel far Niente. Italian always sounds romantic, doesn't it?

Here I am, with hot tea on my right, an english book to devour, checking up lyrics and singing along to Little Flowers.

This makes everything okay now.

Ramlosa!

I´m sitting at Stockholm´s bus station now. This morning, I made a 1.5 hour bus ride up to the airport, where they denied me from boarding the flight without a passport, and then took a 1.5 hour bus ride back here again. Where I was just 6 hours ago. Now, I´m waiting for a bus back to Jonkoping and it´d be another 5 hour journey back home. I have wasted around 400sgd on the flights, bus tickets, and various expenses. I am tired, upset, hungry and thirsty and I need to pee. But I won´t waste money eating, drinking or peeing (2sgd for the tandas).

BUT, I will not be upset anymore and move on. I will NOT be grumpy at anyone, lose my cool, blame anyone (even the thief), count my losses and mope around when I get back.

I´m gonna think happy thoughts (mars bars, prata and yakun), think of valentines day, say a minute´s prayer of peace and breathe. When I get back, I will take a hot shower, change and go to roman´s costume party and have a helluva time.

Because if you´re in the business of ruining people´s days, you´re in the business of failing. Which idiot allows people to ruin their days?

I AM RISING ABOVE THIS SHIT.

heh. I am happy now :) I found an English bookstore and the 5 hour ride would allow me to devour the book I got and that makes me smile. The other night, I dreamt that I found an English bookshop in Jonkoping and there were English books all around me and I was ssoo happy I kept spinning around in the bookstore with my my arms flailing beside me and my eyes closed. Like a girl in love. heh.

December is darkest / in June there's the light.

I'm sorry if everything I wrote recently has been so emo. It is really, the contrary! (Okay, I will use more exclaimation marks in my posts from now on.) I am having the time of my life and I am so thankful for this experience. You can't imagine.

They say at the start you miss home like crazy and at the end of 6 months, you don't wanna go home. I don't wanna go home already. I love it here, I almost wanna stay. Not forever, but for a long, long time.

But when the push comes to shove. When my bag gets stolen and you just want to sit and cry for everything that's gone, you really only think of home. Whether its Singapore, or Jonkoping, I just want to be somewhere that's familiar.

Sigh. I know the stuff that are gone, is just stuff. And it can be replaced. But still, it sucks shit.

But on a much happier note, today we had a great day! You can't imagine. An ice hockey match, hot chocolate at a small gay bar, laughs in the cold and trying to walk on ice. I love stockholm, already.

I just think of home all the time. But that doesn't mean I'm not having the time of my life :)

bummed.

Why are people in the business of ruining people's days?

So. We are on a trip to Stockholm for 3 days and then to Amsterdam for 4. And the first thing when we got to stockholm, was to get McDonalds, some comfort food for the torrid journey.

Dan and I were just too drunk cus we partied the night before. I bought a 700ml vodka for everyone which finished in like 15 minutes because of the incredible amounts of shots that we were downing. It was an incredible night, although it was the most drunk that I have been in Sweden. So we came back at 3, had an after-party at our flat till like 4. Alice was crazy and kept singing and the neighbours gave us shit for it.

But it's a Friday night.

Anyway, we stayed up after the after party to pack because our bus was leaving at 8am. We boarded our buses half-drunk and slept for 4 hours on the way here. The ride was semi-horrible because vodka was still in my empty stomach and dan was ssoo grouchy. HAHA. So we had to have comfort food, the first thing we arrived.

So. We were happily stuffing our face with golden fries when my bag got stolen. Yeah. Inside was my laptop, passport and phone. Thankfully, my camera was with me because I decided to take picture of my meal (only food is worth taking. macs at that.) So was my wallet with all my identifications. So its bad, but not that bad.

Yup. That about sums up my horrible day. We're probably going for dinner with some friends soon. Definitely no partying in Stockholm because the entry alone is like 40 bucks.

I wanna go home. :(

And I don’t know why but with you I’d dance

My address is Norra Bogesundsgatan 4 Rum 111, 55473 Jonkoping, Sweden and my phone is +460762382965. Okay, I'm not sure if you have to add the 0 after +46. My skype name is Han Shiyun Angela and my msn is endorphincrave@gmail.com

So if any of you feel a little lonely and rich, please give me a call or send me a card, photo, anything. Remind me of home. As I so often do. Oh no I'm gonna cry. I miss my cats.

What am I thinking, staying? I'm a wuss. I can't do that.

happy is a yuppie word.

(Its gonna be a long rant.)

It's been a whole month since I've been here. A whole month since I've been away. Time passes by so fast when something is new. There is so much to be thankful for and yet so much that I miss. Being here makes me appreciate home a lot more, and yet see what it misses. Who says it can't be paradoxical.

Living in another country, even for a month, expands your horizons indefinitely. More so, for Jonkoping, because the university is so international you get to meet students from all over the world. I have met students from France, Italy, Germany, Austria, Bosnia, Hong Kong, Korea, Malaysia, Morocco, Canada, Russia, Spain, Mexico, Malaysia, Australia, Turkey, America, Holland, Pakistan, India, Sweden, Finland and countries that I never knew even existed. And everyone, I repeat, everyone, does things differently. The French always give kisses, the Bosnians are really friendly, the Italians are romantic, The Finnish boys drink better than anyone (maybe cus I haven't met any Irish), the Middle Eastern boys are too protective of where they come from, the Mexicans and Spanish make fantastic food and the Australians are always the most fun. 

One thing they all have in common, though. They all speak English but they can never understand it when we Singaporeans talk amongst ourselves. Its like our secret code.

That brings me to what I wanted to write about. I am so thankful for the Singaporeans that are here. There're two groups of us, the group from SMU and the group from NTU. Mostly, the NTU people stick together because we like them parties. More so than the students from SMU. Ironic eh. 

I love you, Jamie, Daniel, Marilyn and Syida. Its odd how we are almost family when we didn't even knew each other a month ago. Its true that human beings flock to their own kind. Initially there was admitted apprehension. I thought that the Singaporeans only wanted to stick together, and didn't want to mix around. And I am not on exchange to be hanging out with Singaporeans. But I was wrong. Syida, Dan and Jamie are one of the most friendly and nicest people that are amongst us international students. 

I knew I started to appreciate them when there was this once, after a long day of school and superficial conversations (I'm not complaining, I know this is part and parcel of meeting new people), the only thing on my mind was "I need my Singapore fix". I needed the 'la's and 'lor's in my conversation and somebody that understands when I say "I miss horlicks", or dances mambo with me when Summer Rain is playing.

You don't know how important it is to have something, someone from home. Especially when it is so easy to be another person when you are here. They remind me of home, keep me grounded and sane. I love it that we are all so alike, partying every Wednesday, fags together, drinking lapin at night, celebrating Chinese New Year together and attempting to go to church on Sunday mornings. I know they probably think that I like hanging out with the other international students more because I am not with them a lot. But truth is, I cannot do without them. I would go insane.

Honestly, I have been thinking about staying. (Mummy, don't freak out. Its just a thought.) Because university here is free, even for the foreigners. And that money saved could go to the higher living standards here. Only downside is that I would have wasted 1.5 years of NTU. But Singapore is such a huge part of my life. So much so that if it were taken from me, I don't know if it would be the same angela. That is why Syida, Dan, Jamie and Marilyn are so important to me. Because if it weren't for them, I don't know what I'd be or how I would change. Its not easy when nothing is familiar.

Dan, me, some weirdass, syida, jamie and carlos.  Sorry Marilyn!

Okay. End of Rant. :) Hit me with a tag if you read through all that junk and my paranoia. You are my true friend ;) I know sometimes the things I write don't make any sense. But I always have to write good thoughts down because they are so easily forgotten. 

On another note, why are boys so possessive? So much so that they still want to keep the things that they can no longer have? Why aren't girls ever that territorial?

You're far too pure and bold, to suffer the strain of the hangman's hold.

Okay. I know its very ugly. But was doing a to-do list and decided on a handwritten post for the blog :) 

Obviously, school is secondary here. What's new.

Anyways, its Italian happy hour now! The Italian boys are cooking for all of us! Then it'd be drinks for the pre-party and akademien tonight!

 

What happens is that every Wednesday (reminiscent of mambo), all the students go to the student club called akademien where drinks are cheaper. But everyone usually has pre parties because the drinks are still cheaper when you buy it yourself. I love pre-parties. We play stupid card games and get really drunk and make stupid videos and yell in the bus. At akademien we just dance ourselves silly till 2. Yupe. I'd try to bring my camera along this time round. :)

Funny tidbits.

Me: Hey I'd be going to Amsterdam next week :)

Roman: You'd be missing my birthday!

Me: Don't worry, I'd bring back some birthday presents :) But will I get caught?

Matteo: No, put the joints in a shampoo bottle. That way you won't get caught. 

(After some thought)

Matteo: I KNOW! You can put the joints in the left pocket of your jacket. But in the other pocket, put a chicken leg. So if the dog smells the joints, take out the chicken leg and explain it to the police "hey, its this..."

Ale: But the policeman will ask you "what's a chicken leg doing in your jacket?"

Matteo: Tell them that you're a Singaporean girl and you're always hungry!

... okay not very funny. But I was damn amused. The End.

finally a picture post.

Yupe. We went skiing.

It was so much fun! We took a 15min bus ride out to the slopes and it was hugeee. And steep. But according to the Italian boys, this was nothing compared to the slopes they have at home. I fell like 124093274 times. But still, everything was awesome. The view of jonkoping at the top of the slope, everyone else's amazing skiing, the snow which fell (albeit from a machine), the wet gloves, the ski lift (which you're suppose to fall when taking it for the first time) and the sitting on the slopes and taking it all in.

Marco and Pelin's boyfriend snowboarded while the rest of us skied. Everyone else skis/snowboards really well and all I was doing was falling. I'm not kidding. My goal of the day was to get to the bottom of the slope unassisted. And I did! Even though it took like xx minutes. Not telling you because you will laugh at me. Every kid, no EVERYONE THERE, skis better than me. Makes me want this life of bringing my kids to the ski slopes instead of getting them to put down their PSP.

At the end of the day, everything hurts. Even things without names hurts. But it was awesome.
You haven't been to Sweden if you haven't gone to the ski slopes.

Since I'm already flooding you with pictures, here's a video of matteo's fantastic skiing. All of them ski like that. I was so ashamed.



***

When we came back, Marco and I made a trip down to church even though there wasn't any service. We sat in the pews in the dark and prayed. I talked to You like I haven't had in awhile and it reminded me of who You are, who I am and what You have done for me.

It was a good day :)

***

I promise I will update more regularly and post more pictures.